#and i'd never made that connection before

[teoft]

It's like Tumblr has become almost a diary for me, thanks to no character limit and a read more button. This atmosphere of acceptance and understanding helps a lot too.

I'll get back to posting actual art, juggling with Twitter and Bluesky along with commissions is taking up a lot of my time.

Anyway, thoughts about art community and being social

For the longest time I've had this feeling of being an outsider in this vague community of artists that see as colleagues of sorts. Like I meet all the "criteria" of being in the group, and yet don't really feel like I'm part of it. Well, it seems I am right in some way, and the reason is that they interact with each other, while I sit here drawing alone.

Unfortunately I've always been prone to isolate myself from others. I grew up feeling like I should be ashamed of loving to draw, since it was always fanart monsters, creatures and cool guys instead of "proper art" like animals and portraits. Before social media, I only drew for myself and never showed anything to anybody. I hid my art from my family, from the world, so that I wouldn't be judged. I think it is one of the biggest reasons why I have trouble interacting with people in the context of art (tbh I'm shit at being social anyway but that's a whole another problem).

Even when I had a scanner and means to post my art online, I never did, due to the whole "if you put something online it'll be there forever" mindset. My first actual account anywhere online must've been Facebook in 2010ish, where I only had a few friends. It was the perfect place for me to finally post anything online, and so I did: I used to post pretty much everything I drew on there. Slowly gaining courage, I eventually made my original Tumblr account, then Deviantart, Twitter, etc.

Still, all I did was throw my art out there in hopes of somebody liking it. I didn't really know how to interact with the people who commented on my posts, so instead I mostly just... made more art. I did have some friend groups here and there, but either they ended up falling apart or my social battery drained in such a way that I slowly drifted away. I had gotten used to just being by myself and relying only on myself in the online art world.

During my design studies, I started putting more thought and work on promoting myself, so that it could be one career path for me to take. My mindset was that I'll work hard and become "big", even if it meant that one post gained me just one follower. In 2020 I ended up going viral with a meme and suddenly getting tens of thousands of followers. It was great and a welcome boost of morale, but unfortunately 2020 was otherwise one of the worst years in my life.

Throughout the years people have come and gone, so the only constant for me has been myself, and my drive to develop my skills. Thus it's been too easy for me to just isolate myself. In a way it has been my strength with regards to art, but sometimes I wish I knew how to make lasting connections. I think/know I might be autistic to some degree, which adds to the difficulty of being social. Though, to be honest, I don't know if I'd gotten this far without my autistic hyperfixations.

I guess the thing I need to do now to fix this problem of loneliness and isolation is to just... slowly try and be more social. To reply to comments and talk to people. All of which is easier said than done. Still, just gotta take that first step and then keep going.

Despite lacking the kind of community I yearn for, it seems I've made a name for myself, enough so that people seem to take pride in knowing me. Or at least that's the impression I've gotten a few times. But still, I am happy that I've had a positive effect on people. After all, my two main motivators in art are that I like doing it, and I like when people enjoy my art.

[feuerfreiarchive]

In a 2003 interview with Legion, Flake shared a funny anecdote: "When we first came to Mexico City, we played together with Kiss at the Stadion del Sol. We flew back in the middle of the night on a Boeing 747 and shortly after takeoff Till said to me: 'Man, if we crash now, we're going to kill a few thousand people.' You have to know, we just flew over the slums. Suddenly there was a bang and it came from the front. And I thought: 'Aha, the cockpit exploded, bye, thanks!' Till said to me: 'Have a look and see if the engines are burning.' We kept sinking. At that moment I took Till's hand and said: 'I actually don't want to die!'. A stream of sweat ran down between our hands and it was dead quiet around us. The lights were off and the screens were dark too, 'So' I thought, ‘so now I'm going to be on the news’. Just like the magazine List sometimes says: 'Plane crashed - 200 dead - the causes are being investigated.' All I can say is: I now know how it feels to be in a plane like this just before it hits the ground. Paul turned to us. Very slowly, like a puppet, he made a gesture like I'd never seen before: he just waved at us, it was like, 'Guys, it was nice seeing you’. I looked at Till and thought through everything that was in my life that happened so far and somehow in my head there was only one 'Well, yes!'... We didn't hit the ground after all, it kept going... What I only found out much later: the plane was struck by lightning and what happened is that all computer programs failed. From that moment on, the pilots flew this gigantic airplane again like before: with cables to the wings. Suddenly the Stewarts came through again and asked: What do you want to drink? Our connecting flight was then like taking a tram. There is definitely a feeling of being a newborn. In retrospect, Till, who was just writing lyrics just before the bang, said: 'I was about to write ejaculation!'" Quote from Legacy (2003) Photo by Frank Lothar Lange (Teotihuacan, Mexico, April 1999)

x

[givingblood]

I will say that although Arcane had a lot of missed opportunities and I feel like their priorities were in the aesthetics first, I have to hand it to em for what they gave me in season 1 and act 1 of season 2, that was the most comprehensive cohesive power house of story telling I've ever watched.

I think something got lost in translation, they saw people loving the music from ekko & jinx on the bridge and the hype online from the fight scenes and decided this was their strength and while they are perfect at it, their strength was always in their character writing and story telling.

I don't blame the excitement of trying to blast your audience with the best animation and sound design ever but it really made me miss the subtle moments, the ones that made me fall in love with Arcane.

I liked how grounded season 1 was, it had magic ofc, it had different species and otherworldly elements but I could follow it, I could interpret how the story may go, predict steps or theorise on possible outcomes given how the characters interacted with the world around them, in season 2 I felt completely blindsighted, there was no point trying to anticipate what would happen with Mel, why Ambessa was scared, Who Viktor is or will become because it never set up the environment in a way to be able to do so.

It was like putting you inside a whole new reality (literally sometimes) and you just had to hold on for dear life while it showed you shit you never expected to see. There were no base line rules, no nothing. This is where I started to disconnect from Arcane and associate it with League of Legends, it felt less like a battle of two cities and more like 40 League shorts stitched together.

But what they gave me with Caitlyn and Vi is a feeling I've never had before, I'm a bit older and I've been cynical all my life about the importance of representation and how I could never really connect with media in these sort of ways, and I think it took one good lesbian couple, who are complicated and interesting characters for me to go "wow, this is what everyone meant by representation"

I'd never connected as much in my life to a character as I did Vi, someone who just cant let go, a big sister, angry, hot headed, masculine in her appearance and a ball of guilt and self sabotage, like just being able to see a person like that in media taken seriously and not thrown to the corners of the internet under "woke garbage" was so heart warming for me.

Anyway I did not intend to rant like this at all.

I love Arcane and I will for a very long time and I'm so happy I got to experience it. Nothing is perfect and I'm just grateful.

[vidavalor]

You never know! I'd say this connects to there being a few Christmas story references in S2. It seems like they're using the complicated relationship with Christmas that a lot of people have and the pressures its impending return can bring as one of the ways they're talking about the mental health issues at the heart of the season.

TW: brief mention of suicide ideation

It's A Wonderful Life: The Book of Life bit mentioned above being kinda like this story, plus the allusion through Muriel's thirty-whatever-order scrivener ranking being like how they refer to Clarence in the film. S2 also begins with Crowley & Aziraphale as angels in the sky, which is kind of similar to the start of the film.

It's A Wonderful Life is a film set at Christmas but that is about unchecked anxiety and depression. It is about mental health issues and suicide and uses the common elements of a person's suicide narrative as the foundation for telling a story that talks about those issues and seeks to have them be better understood by its audience. It is the most famous (and probably most impactful) story ever done like this. It fits into S2 thematically because we're watching Aziraphale go a bit George Bailey.

Not coincidentally, it's the second famous work of art centered around suicide to be referenced in S2-- this one talking about PTSD and suicide. The other is Salinger's "A Perfect Day for Bananafish." It's not Christmas-related but it is thematically related to S2.

A Christmas Carol: Aziraphale as Fezziwig to Nina's Young Scrooge:

If it's been a minute since you read or watched A Christmas Carol, Mr. Fezziwig was the beloved former employer of a young Ebenezer Scrooge. He is only in the story briefly but is one of the most lovable characters in it. Scrooge adored him and had fond memories of working for him. Fezziwig was the fair and equitable employer that an adult Scrooge is not-- he treated Scrooge and the others well, genuinely cared about them, and made sure they were well-provided for. The Fezziwigs are examples of responsible, morally sound business owners-- they make a good living and live comfortably but not at the expense of their employees, suppliers, customers, etc.. They genuinely care about the people around them and are generous with their time, money, material resources, and affection.

What Scrooge remembers is how kind Fezziwig was to him and how encouraging. He would put Scrooge's anxieties at ease, as we see him do in the story when he encourages Scrooge to stop working, and then turns his business into a Christmas party full of food and dancing and romance. This is what Aziraphale is trying to do for Nina and Maggie with The Meeting Ball.

Fezziwig encourages the people around him to embrace life and one another and enjoy their lives. He shown to be very happily married; he and Mrs. Fezziwig are a kind, true pair-- madly in love, still flirting and dancing together happily at the party.

Aziraphale wants to be Fezziwig. In every way that matters, he already is, but this scene in S2 gives impression that this party is also about Aziraphale trying to give himself permission to just go ahead and embrace his inner Fezziwig. He's already the type of business owner and person that Fezziwig is (even if he'll stress that he's not good enough because that's Aziraphale) but he's never been able to actually have this Christmas party of his dreams before.

This angel has longed to be able to make this scene in the book happen in real life for the people around him. It's his secret dream to just close down the street, give everyone some food and music, help the young people fall in love, and dance with his beloved spouse at their Christmas party. To be among everyone and part of their lives without fear, open about who he is and openly enjoying the life he and his partner made together. He's got Fezziwig on the brain when Nina talks to him about how she feels, showing that The Meeting Ball is really Jane Austen meets Dickens.

The Final 15 is also a lot like what if no ghosts visited a non-redemptive Scrooge [Our Villain] and he just was full on evil instead of redeemable and then he showed up on "Christmas Day" (the day after Aziraphale's Fezziwig's "Christmas Eve" party) to Fred/Bob Cratchit [Aziraphale] anyway and just lied his ass off about wanting to redeem himself to manipulate?

Elf: Burning down toxic masculinity bullshit and talking about benefits of mindful living, emotional availability, and creative outlets as prescriptive for depression by having a character who lacks social dynamic understanding of the world around him but approaches that world with an openness, a gentleness, and an enthusiastic sense of wonder that patriarchal societies teach men is "unmasculine"... am I talking about Buddy the Elf or am I talking about Jimbriel?

In light of the recent Christmas jumpers worn by Rob Wilkins, I thought of the clues the story in S2 left for us that yes, S3 might take place during Christmas.

If anyone else hasn't listed this one yet, the Metatron says "wrap things up" near the end of S2.

I remembered way back to my post about Crowley being summoned to Hell by Beelzebub.

I remarked:

There's an "It's a Wonderful Life" reference here, I realize...With this concept of erasing someone from the Book of Life, I'm inclined to think that a person wiped from existence cannot learn "a lesson" because they don't exist anymore! But wait. That is what happened in the movie "It's a Wonderful Life". The angel Clarence showed the human George Bailey a reality where he, George Bailey, no longer existed because he had never been born. George learned "a lesson" about the value of his own life.

I did acknowledge it might be foreshadowing and didn't think it would be particularly interesting, but "It's a Wonderful Life" is a well-known Christmas movie, so this prospect has become at least a little more likely in my eyes.

We might (briefly?) see a reality without Crowley, Aziraphale, or both, with their roles in Eden.

[icewindandboringhorror]

More misc. daily life pictures and such

[molagboop]

I just think it would be fun to make Raven Beak smooch Samus' other dads.

[seafoam-taide]

You know I thought for awhile that I was just a rare type of person who sure, liked people well enough but was okay being alone didn't necessarily need anyone and NO. NO. NO. OH MY GOD . YOU GIANT DUMBASS. NO HAHAHA NOOO NOPE

[atangledfate]

The old bird didn't comment on the caretaker, but the fact certain parties in Sol had never made a move on the clock. Was probably a good indication that he was correct. Eternity was no ones fool, and had existed since before time began and started the great wheel of time. Morpheus was not convinced the old primal had died, but rather was waiting for something or perhaps trapped somehow? Thoughts that he'd have t dwell on later. For now he focused on his sister and this stranger from another world.

" Greetings Sister, i do apologize for the sudden visit... though, we have Vistors who wished to speak with you. "

Sol gave her brother a courteous nod as she turned her eyes to Blitz, her tail swishing from side to side. She seemed quite comfortable in her guise, and could only smile at the stranger, a kindness flowing from her like a river. Though a smile could mean many things, she gave the impression of a wise woman on a mountain rather then some all powerful goddess.

" Oh, pish posh! walking as a great flame as true as it might be. Isn't the best way to greet someone. It can be rather uninviting... and i will have no one say i am not a gracious host... "

She placed her hands behind her and gave the other deity a moment to speak his mind. She seemed to never stop smiling but perhaps that was the unsettling part. Despite what was asked she didn't seem to betray her emotions, and kept herself quite calm. Morpheus could never quite tell what his sister was thinking and knew should she be upset you'd never know unless she decided to punish you.

" AH, i see... i did tell my daughter there would be consequences to her decision... and then she went and brought dear poppys whole family as well. While i have no issue with this act, i imagine its quite a disruption for your world... "

She made a motion with her hand as the realm around them shifted and churrned until they stood within a little cottage deeper within the island. A simple little home with a little fireplace, a stove, and many herbs dangling around the rather primitive cottage. The goddess motioned to a small table where Tea waited for them, the perks of a dreamscape--- it was what she wished it to be.

" Let us have tea, and we can discuss what it is you wish to change. Though i admit i do not have power over fate here... that would be the timekeeper... Eternities realm. Though they has been missing for many generations now. His caretaker Archimedes is the one to speak to on the matter. But before i allow this i would like to know details... it is my daughters fate after all and she's important to me..."

As the conversation turned to herself she seemed to smile warmly at the offer. Though there was something about the smile that was both sad, and warm at the same time. She found a seat at the table and picked her own Tea up and stared at it. She was silent for a long moment as if searching for the right words to speak.

" ... the Spark of Life, it's a peculiar thing don't you think? Have you ever stopped and watched a mortals life, just watched them born, live, struggle, love, and be loved... and die? I'm connected to all life by proxy all mortals on soul are part of me. Like them i am part of a great cycle... "

She paused taking a sip of the tea and gazing at blitz with that same smile though she did look quite tired.

" That Cycle is coming to a close, to rekindle my flame now... i'd be defying my own cycle... it would be unnatural, and go against my very ideals. My time is coming to a close... soon my daughter will be fully prepared... She believes she is kindling, to be consumed by me in order to fuel my pyre and reignite the spark of life. That she will end her own existence for me... "

Sol smiled again though was more genuine and proud, as if she was very proud of her daughter. She couldn't think of a better reward for her, a better way to say she loved her. A better way to give herself to this world she loved so much!

" That kind of loving selfless sacrifice is what this world needs... But, you see it will not be her that is consumed. But rather my essence shall enter her... i shall cease to be as a new Goddess of life is born, and she shall be my living legacy... so you see, i can't accept your offer. As generous as it is... my time comes to a close... and i am content with that... But i appreciate your concern, and am flattered by your kindness...but i must also ask that this never be spoken to my daughter--- she must never know least she may not be willing to go through with it..."

"Nothing to gain in all honesty, expect maybe for the fact if a certain specter attempts to weasel their way in this universe, she can incinerate whoever they try to send here in an instant. Other than that, it just comes down to the fact that I could possibly help so I figured I should offer it." Blitz only needed permission to slightly alter Blaze's timeline so anything else was simply him wanting to try and help.

"Well, I certainly hope he made this caretaker powerful as well. It wouldn't be very wise to leave something that can control all of time without someone strong enough to crush anyone trying to control it." If the time God of here was as smart as Morpheus made him seem then wouldn't be surprised if the caretaker was packing some serious fighting power.

"It's not that I don't have a need for it, I'm just storing up energy. Even as we speak it's building up, higher and higher. It's not something most look out for, though if you look closely enough, you'll see me slowly soaking up cosmic energy. If things go well, I'll have a rather powerful ace up my sleeve for when things get real crazy in the universe that I'm from." Seemed he was gearing up for something big.

Blitz didn't seem phased by the voice as he looked up at Sol, and then having to look down a bit, though still up. "I was expecting something intense. I don't mind if you chill in your true form. I'd do the same thing if I had a crazy cosmic form, though this is the only one I've ever had since I'm not your typical primordial. If I don't end up kicking the bucket down the line, I'll tell you about it." Blitz better move on to business.

"Only name I got is Blitz, mainly because I can't remember my own. As for why I'm here, the God of Time from my universe needs to make a small adjustment to Blaze's timeline, only because it sorta crosses with Poppy's now. Nothing crazy, just the time Poppy ended up here which would add more detail to what life was like in Flora. Also, if you can make it so she does remember the unaltered timeline that'd be cool. I'd rather her not we did that."

"That's about the only thing I really need your help on. Other than that, if you'd like I can help restore your flame back to its prime. I also know a guy who can hopefully make you a physical body to connect to so you can freely and safely check on things easily. Oh, and if you want, I can throw a few tests at Blaze to improve her skills. Nothing crazy or dangerous, though it'll push her. She could also land the Forger making her a divine weapon."

[ningningkittie]

im in love w him not only bc of who he is as a person nd how drawn i am to his personality, but also bc i feel like he's the only one who has ever wanted to see me. who i am, like deep down. he's the only one who i feel like i've ever connected with, in an easy nd genuine way. the only one who i feel has ever gotten me. he's the only one who's ever made me feel like we actually have a connection we're both in on, bc i havent had to pretend or put up a fake front for him bc he wanted the real image of me.

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Had a dream about a magic school AU. Like... Literally my school but with magic and with Roxy as a protag because Blorbo. She was the only one in the school without magic so every magic lesson, she'd literally just take a nap on the desk. What else is she gonna do?

But also I dreamed how she was compensating for not having magic. She was mixing chemicals into explosives to win fights and like... Yeah it's kinda hard to argue against the dog with Potion of Kaboom™️

However, because it was a dream, my brain combined the Glams with the cast of Ni No Kuni 2 and got very confused when I woke up because the Kuni 2 cast actually fit a magic environment but FNaF guys do not lmao

There was also a bit where Roxy not having magic means naturally, she doesn't rely on it to solve problems. So while everyone was given the task of making a candle go out without blowing on it, she just. Stared in absolute bafflement as everyone around her immediately dove to figuring out spells that extinguish flames. Instead of just. Water. From the tap. Right next to them.

She decided to freak them out a bit for fun and when the teacher asks for volunteers to come forward to show what they've come up with, she immediately puts her paw up and gets called on. She wets her paw under the tap before anyone has their attention on her, walks up to the candle at the front desk, turns so everyone can see, says all professional "Today, I've learned..." pauses and then... just pinches the flame out. Literally just pinches the wick between the paw pads on her fingers and it goes out immediately. "That you guys are idiots." And walks back to her seat in silence with a smirk.

Naturally, a bunch of kids are yelling that she can't just do that what the fuck?! But she did just do that. It took her half a second to do what's taken all of them a good forty minutes to figure out at least. Teacher asks how she knew that would work and she just "you can't have a flame without oxygen. Obviously." and you get a chorus of "WHAT" and "WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT?!" She's so damn smug about it lmao these people make showing off too easy sometimes.

Like sure, she physically can't pass a mandatory magic exam unless she's able to figure out ways around it, but she can at least fuck around in lessons lmao. She tried skipping them but they started getting on her family with all the typical mandatory attendance shit so she has to go now :/ she just sleeps in them or fucks with people for fun since everyone likes to flaunt their magic on her every day anyway. Eat shit assholes she knows how to put fire out with minimal effort!

I think there was also a bit about her trying to convince teachers that a non-magic sports club would be a good idea?? And failing miserably because they just don't see the value in a magic school with non-magic sports. Thinking now, she could probably make her own club after school but probably wouldn't get that much traction with it... Resenting her family and teachers and every power that be forever because she could be a top student and could be doing amazing in school if she was just in a non-magic focused one. But she's stuck here and it sucks.

I don't know where I'd go with the story but eh it's neat I like it! Definitely different to my normal stuff!

[greentypewriters]

today i spent an absurd amount of time making my wii remote work with windows so i could play fear and hunger with it. and it was worth it

[buildingshitwithcrab]

Absolutely wonderful <3 If you're still prototyping: if you can get one side of the roof to hinge open and snap shut, it can be storage for all the 2nd floor pieces without simply piling them onto the 1st floor.

started trying to make a little toy house

[areyoudoingthis]

i had an even better theater class today i love doing things that move me and inspire me

[kurthorton-moving]

oh twitter bookmarks, facebook saved, instagram saved, tiktok bookmarks, tumblr likes, my beloveds (i will never ever open them again)

[mattybsgroupie]

help | chris sturniolo

contents: fwb; first time; fingering (f receiving); p in v; use of “y/n”; virgin!reader; soft dom!chris

♡⊹𑄽୧

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ notes: oh maria you said you’d post weekly WELL I LIED. i got pretty busy with college but ! only a few weeks left till the semester is over ♡ finally had the guts to write chris and i think i’m finally ready to admit that i NEED to have sex with him lmao. a bit different from the usual stuff (it's chris being sweet with a sub!virgin!reader) and not proofread as usual, but hope you enjoy ♡

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ requested by: anon

♡⊹𑄽୧

“ma” chris chuckled. when he noticed i wasn’t kidding, his blue eyes suddenly widened in disbelief. “are you serious?” he said in a high-pitched tone.

“well, someone should’ve told me that being a virgin is a crime” i rolled my eyes, closing my fist and playfully punching his shoulder.

“ouch!” chris pretended to be hurt. his brothers were traveling and he couldn’t stay alone with his thoughts for too long, asking me to come over and keep him company.

“i mean” he started, clearing his throat. “it’s not a crime. i just don’t understand how?” i narrowed my eyes and chris knew that meant watch your mouth. “c’mon, you know how hot you are”

“shut up, chris” the corners of my lips gave away how much i enjoyed hearing that.

chris slowly dragged his feet on the wooden floor, coming closer to me. one of his hands stopped by my hips, giving a light squeeze there.

“i’m not kidding” he whispered in a gentle tone, his blue eyes tenderly looking at me. “you’re a virgin, but you know how it works... right?” he raised one of his eyebrows.

i denied with my head, trying to look somewhere else.  “what do you mean? no one ever made you feel good?” chris questioned me again. i sunk my teeth on my bottom lip, refusing to answer him again.

i had never been intimate with any guy, and chris knew it. what amazed him was the fact that i couldn't even make myself cum.

“nah” he said, a smirk appearing on his face “y/n, you never had an orgasm?”

i could feel the sudden heat spreading through my body, the fingers he had pressed against my skin becoming warmer, my cheeks flushed from embarrassment.

“how come a pretty girl like you has never felt good, hm? we gotta change that, don’t you think?” chris said, tucking my hair behind my ear before taking his fingers to my jaw, his thumb gently lifting my chin so i'd look at him.

my heart started beating faster as his grip on me grew tighter. chris leaned in and sealed our lips in a gentle, lingering kiss, full of affection and care.

he pulled away, a silly grin hanging on his mouth. “you had done this before, right?” he teased and i rolled my eyes, letting go of him.

chris pulled me back, wrapping his arm around my waist, this time locking our lips together in a passionate, almost desperate kiss.

“let me make you feel good” he said and i let out a deep sigh, my hands immediately going to his hair, gently pulling his locks. chris moaned and wasn’t planning on holding himself back.

his sounds sent a shiver down my spine and i immediately felt myself getting wet. the grip chris had on my waist grew stronger and our tongues were fighting for dominance until he pulled away, catching his breath. a tiny strand of saliva still connected our lips together, his were swollen and flushed as if we had been making out for hours. 

chris placed both hands on my cheeks, cupping them together before placing delicate kisses across my face. i only noticed chris had been leading me towards his room when my back touched the door, the sound of wood creaking open removing me from my trance.

“you’re such a player, aren’t you?” i chuckled, noticing my situation. i couldn’t run away even if i wanted to, chris’s arms were placed on each side of my shoulders, holding me in place. “how many girls have been here before, huh?”

“you’re the first one” he said, going to my neck and starting to suck my exposed skin, making me gasp from the sudden contact.

“liar” i breathed out, tugging on his hair. chris chuckled and stopped the kisses, his gaze trying to tell me something. “i wouldn’t lie to you” he said, the emotional tone on his voice showing he was being truthful to me and to himself.

“but… you’re not a virgin” i said, placing my palms on his chest and dragging my index over his shirt, drawing circles on the white fabric.

“that doesn’t mean i’m a slut!” chris widened his blue orbs and a fake moan came out of his mouth when i playfully twisted his nipple. “i think you are” i giggled, opening the door and walking into his room. 

i threw myself on the bed, striking a sexy pose. i took off my slippers and crossed my foot over my leg, calling chris with my index finger.

he grinned mischievously, locking the bedroom door and walking towards me. chris was standing in front of me, his legs slightly parted, biting his lower lip. i adjusted my position and raised my palms up to his waistband, teasing him.

“hey, no” chris said, taking my wrists. “this is about you” he started, gently pushing my body against the mattress and crawling on top of me.

“i’m gonna take care of you. i don’t care if i end up cumming in my pants” chris chuckled, his hardened cock showing through the gray fabric.

i simply nodded, my cheeks flushing from the affection and attention. i was aching for him. i could feel my pussy throbbing, the wet patch on my panties growing bigger with each kiss.

chris tugged on the hem of my shirt, silently asking for permission to take it off. he mumbled a small “fuck” while placing his palm underneath the cloth, his large hand pressing against my tummy and making its way upwards. he groped my breasts and with his free hand, removed my shirt. “y/n... god” he whispered, “can i see 'em?” chris asked about my boobs.

“please” i moaned, wrapping my legs around his waist and bringing him closer to me. “just make me feel good, please” i pleaded, tangling my fingers on his brown locks.

“i got you ma” he chuckled at my eagerness. chris placed kisses on my collarbones and reached for my breasts, his sneaky fingers untying my bra and letting them fall free next to his face. chris clenched his jaw, licking his own lips.

“you're so fucking beautiful” he praised, placing a peck in one of my nipples. the gentle act sent a shiver down my spine, making me gasp as he started to carefully lick my hardened nub.

i could feel chris's cock lazily getting dragged against my thigh, his hips moving in a slow, rhythmic pace. he breathed heavily against my skin and each time his tongue circled around my nipple i whined.

i needed more.

“chris” i called him. “i need you— need you so bad”

“i'm right here princess” he whispered, trailing kisses down my torso. “let's go slow, yeah? i promise you're gonna feel so good” he assured me, both indexes playing with the strands of my shorts. i nodded desperately, lifting my hips up and helping him to remove my last piece of clothing.

“shit” chris muttered under his breath. “we’re both so fucking wet” he gazed at my drenched panties and then at his own pants, a wet spot of pre-cum forming on the fabric.

chris brushed two of his fingers over my underwear, nudging my clit. my jaw went slack and my thighs involuntarily attempted to close. chris chuckled lightly, tapping my knees and forcing my legs apart.

he positioned his body in between my thighs and slid down on the mattress, his face resting on my hipbone. he began to fiddle with the seam of my panties, teasing me, as if he was going to pull them off at any moment.

“stop fooling around” i softly spoke, not really mad at him. “but she's so pretty” chris said, dragging his index across the damp fabric and pouting his lips. i giggled, ruffling his hair.

chris's bright blue eyes had a both kind and concerned gaze, and he used his sense of humor to soothe me. “good girl, let me have fun here” he pulled my panties down, leaving me fully exposed.

chris gulped dryly and licked his own lips before placing two digits in between my wet folds, stroking every inch of my pussy. i gave out a deep sigh when his fingers reached me and whimpered when chris began to spread my lower lips.

chris then moved his thumb to my clit, rubbing it in circular motions. my hips instinctively bucked upwards, making me bring my palm to my face and cover my mouth in embarassment.

“don't hide it” he ordered, “i wanna hear you. i wanna hear that you're feeling good, that i'm the only one who makes you feel good”. chris laid down next to me, pulling me near his chest. he locked our lips together as his fingers remained against my pussy, slowly fondling me.

“taking me so well, princess” he whispered, smooching every spot he could reach. “think i can put a finger in? have you done this before?” chris asked, his voice full of concern.

“i… i tried” i confessed, reminding him that i had never gotten all the way to the end. “gonna go real slow f'you” he said, his middle finger slipping down my folds and reaching my entrance. chris pressed my hole and gradually entered me.

when he got all the way in, my jaw was hanging open as i panted heavily and chris kept on praising me, “there you go, such a good girl. it's all in baby, 'm so proud”.

he allowed me to stay like that for a while, getting used to his size, i moved my hips downwards when i was finally ready and chris quickly understood, curling his finger inside my walls and reaching for my sweet spot.

the knot in my lower belly tightned when he found it. “theeeere we go ma” he said, thrusting into me as he massaged my clit.

“chris” i called, desperation taking over me. “i'm f-feeling it— ah! i'm g-gonna—“

“shh, i got you. you wanna cum on my fingers?” he asked, speeding up the pace of his thrusts. “no? where then?”

“your cock, please” i said, not a thought going through my mind. all i cared about was having chris inside me. “fuck, i’m not gonna last long if you keep talking like that”.

“are you sure? we don’t have to do this, y’know” chris said and whined. “no! i want it!”

chris immediately stood up, hovering over me. he removed his pants, cock slapping against his lower belly. chris was huge, the flushed tip leaking pre-cum all the way down his veins. i held my breath nervously when he started to pump his shaft, coating his dick.

“shit, i forgot” chris spoke. “i don't have any condoms here, fuck”

“pull out” i told him and chris widened his eyes. “i'm on the pill, i promise” i chuckled, calming him down as he placed himself in between my legs.

“well, i wouldn't mind putting a baby in you” he spoke and i could feel his swollen, leaking tip rubbing against my lower lips, trying to get in. it wasn't long until my walls were stretched out, fitting chris inside of me. it burned and it hurt like i never felt before, my nails digging on his back as i squeezed my eyes shut, trying to adjust to his size.

chris began to to move his hips cautiously, just enough to make me moan. “fuck fuck fuck” i whimpered as his cock filled me up. i could feel my orgasm approaching, overwhelmed by the new sensation.

“‘m close” i cried, “so close chris fuck!”

“don't hold yourself back princess” he said, encouraging me. his fingers went to my clit, rubbing it quickly. his cock, his words, his fingers — it was all too much. the knot in my lower belly snapped and i felt my body collapsing, my mind going blank as my orgasm washed over me. my whole body trembled as chris held me close, whispering praises at me.

i whined when he removed himself, spurting his cum all over my belly in a loud groan. chris threw himself over me, nuzzling his face against my chest. “i think i’m in love with you” he said. i giggled, playfully pulling his hair “shut the fuck up, chris”.

“thank you for helping me, handsome. it was so much better than i had expected” i thanked him and he gave me a peck “anytime, princess”.

♡⊹𑄽୧

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♡⊹𑄽୧

[entitled-fangirl]

Manhood.

Virgin!Cregan Stark x virgin!wife!reader

Summary: the two newlyweds lose their virginity together.

Warnings: sex, it's just all sex, foreplay, undressing, kissing, breast play, p in v, fingering kinda, all of the things you could've guessed were in here. :) and Cregan being a VIRGIN

A/n: phew. Based on an ask.

Part 2

Masterlist

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"What are you saying exactly?" She asked him. 

"I… I have not laid with a woman before," Cregan admitted.

She froze. The Lord of Winterfell. The Wolf of the North. Cregan was a virgin?

He was always so confident. Now, she could see a light tremor in his hands. 

"Never?"

He shook his head, "It was not for a lack of girls throwing themselves at me. I just… never… wished to partake in such things until… the time was right."

She nodded. "And… is the time right?"

He grinned and cupped her face, "You're now my wife." He kisses her lightly, "What better time than now?"

She smiled and reached back, unlacing the outer layer of her wedding dress, letting the fabric fall to expose more of herself to him.

Was Cregan Stark blushing?

His eyes trailed anywhere but her frame, the tremor continuing.

"Touch me, Cregan."

He let out a heated groan, an obvious tent forming in his pants. 

But when he did not move, she took it upon herself to help him. She grabbed his hand, bringing it up to her body, moving his hand to trail up her stomach to rest at the base of her breasts. 

"Why are you so nervous?" She asked softly.

He let out a shaky breath, "My whole life, I've waited for this. I've imagined this moment a million times, imagining pleasuring my wife. But now that I'm here… I'm at a loss."

She grabbed his other hand and placed it on her hip. "Tell me."

He almost visibly gulped. "W…Wha-"

"Tell me all of the things you imagined doing to me."

Gods, if he wasn't hard yet, he definitely was then. "It's… it's hardly something a lady sho-"

"Cregan, tell me."

She reached up, untying his cloak and letting it fall to the ground behind him.

"Well… I imagined I'd start by undressing you…"

His fingers became brave and he reached back and began to untie the rest of her dress.

"Then?" She tilted her head up to look at him. 

"I'd kiss every inch I undressed."

Her breath hitched when another layer of her dress fell, leaving her in her shift.

Cregan grinned and leaned down, brushing his nose against her neck as he began to trail kisses down it.

She melted against him, enjoying the feel of his hands around her waist. "What after?" She breathed.

"Patience, my wife."

The way the control flitted back and forth between them made her head spin with lust. Both so eager to take the reins, but just as eager to let the other. 

He was quick to pull his tunic over his head and lead her backward to lay on the furs of his bed.

Looking at her and seeing no distress, he gathered her shift and pulled it off of her, leaving her bare.

His eyes wandered over her frame, a low breath leaving his lungs involuntarily. 

What a beautiful girl.

She leaned up on her elbows with bright eyes, watching him intently.

He smiled and began to crawl over her, capturing her lips with his.

A spark lit between the two, each letting the flames rise as their bodies brushed against one another.

He pulled away just enough to speak, "Has anyone touched you, my girl?" He whispered softly.

She let out a moan at the soft tone in his voice. "Only… only I have, Cregan."

He nodded, connecting their lips again. 

The makeout continued for quite some time, their tongues clashing as they both became nervous about moving past this point.

She reached to the side to take one of Cregan's hands. The tremor was still there.

She pulled it down her body, moving his fingers to brush over her clit lightly. She jerked at the feeling. 

He took the initiative, taking time to tease her as his fingers brushed over the nerves. 

Eventually, he settled on gently rubbing his thumb over the area.

She disconnected her lips from his as her mouth gaped open and a sinful moan left her throat. 

Cregan felt himself smile a bit, proud that his nervous movements had made such an impression on her.

He continued for a while, experimenting to see what made her hips jerk up or what make her scratch his back. Each noise from her throat was like music to his ears. 

A shaky hand pushed him away, making his brows furrow. "Love, is something wrong-"

She pushed on his shoulder, and he sat up in confusion.

But the confusion was quickly erased when she sat up with him and clambered into his lap. Her nose pushed his head up as her lips moved to his neck. "I want to finish together." One of her hands moved to his small clothes. "Take it off," she panted out.

Cregan let out a shaky gasp as she began to suck on a sensitive spot on his neck that he didn't even know was there. His hips jerked up, making her hiss lightly when his clothed erection brushed against her slit.

"Easy, Cregan."

His voice was a breathy pant. "S…sorry my love. I am… trying to-" 

A whine left his throat as she did it again, and he could feel her pause her actions when a smile came over her face. "Do not tease me…"

He lifted his hips lightly with one hand and the other pulled off his small clothes, quickly discarding it to the side.

She leaned back, admiring the naked form of her husband. He felt himself flush as her eyes moved up and down his frame without shame. 

They simply stared at one another, unsure of what to do next.

"What did you imagine next?" She asked.

He finally gained some confidence back, "I never finished the first thing."

With her still in his lap, Cregan pulled her close to him, his lips moving to her chest. 

She let out a hum.

With his hands supporting her, he leaned her back and his lips moved to her breast.

Her hands gripped his hair as he began to suck on her nipple, pushing him closer to her as her back arched up.

"Feels good?" He asked.

The vibration of his voice made a whine come from her. He took that as answer enough.

He continued, giving small kitten licks and teasing her. 

He lowered her to the furs completely now, resuming his position over her. "Think you're ready?"

She nodded, pulling his face to hers, kissing him deeply.

He moved his hips forward, his tip barely entering her. 

"You're sure?" He asked one last time.

She nodded again. 

With that, Cregan pushed through, carefully watching her reactions. The room filled with the two's moans.

He paused as he felt the resistance of her maidenhood.

"Cregan, just… just fuck me already."

He pushed, moving his lips on hers when a pained cry came through. 

Once seated completely, he pulled his head back again. "Breathe, sweet girl. I'll stay like this as long as you need me to."

She laid there, her eyes shut tightly as the pain started to subside just a bit. Her body adjusted and she panted, "move. Cregan, move, please."

He nodded, beginning to move his hips at a steady pace. 

His hands were shaking again. 

The two let out desperate whines and groans at the new feeling between them. 

"I..." He groaned. "I imagined you like this... taking me... so pretty.."

Already lust-driven, they didn't last long. 

When he decided to repeat his past actions against her clit, her hands pulled his hair, "Cregan… Cregan… ugh… there's… there's a feeling…"

He nodded, forcing his hips to continue. "Give into it."

"Witho… without you?"

He groaned, only nodding again when he didn't trust his voice.

She came soon after, her nails leaving a path down Cregan's back that she'd no doubt feel guilty for later.

With her walls clamping down on him, he hissed and was at his high not long after. The strong man shook with a whine as he did so. He had highs, yes. But none were like this. 

The two only panted as they looked at one another in sex-filled bliss. 

He pulled out from her, watching his seed begin to leak out. 

Confused, he took two fingers and gently pushed the substance back into her. She jerked her hips back, flinching at the sensitive feeling.

"Sorry. Don't want to waste any of it," a genuine grin spread across his face.

She chuckled, coming across unsteady.

He laid himself down next to her, bringing her to him as he did.

The two laid in silence as Cregan's hands brushed through her hair. 

"Guess we should get you cleaned up," Cregan finally said. 

Soft snores answered him back. 

He untangled himself from her, laying her down onto the bed. 

He returned with a wet cloth, gentle not to disturb her or dishonor her in sleep. 

When she was deemed clean enough for him, he threw the rag aside and joined her in bed, letting sleep welcome him as well.

…

When she was too sore to leave the bed the next few days, Cregan was attentive to her needs. The two bathed, ate, and chatted the days away. 

The North rejoiced when her moon blood was late after that.

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Part 2

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